How to Deal with Loneliness and Find Joy

Aug 12, 2022

Loneliness is defined as a condition of feeling isolated and emotionally or physically detached.

Loneliness comes in so many forms.

One of them is a feeling of isolation or lack of social contact, often experienced as a pain.

Loneliness can be a result of an individual's personal choice or situation, but it can also be the result of social isolation such as moving to a new area where nobody knows the person.

What Causes Loneliness?

Loneliness is a complex subject with many different definitions and theories. In general, loneliness is associated with negative outcomes such as social disengagement, lack of social support, psychological distress and impaired physical health.

Loneliness is an unwanted emotional state of being that can occur feeling isolated, abandoned or left out. There are many forms of loneliness: Physical/psychological/emotional aspects:-Separation anxiety (feeling insecure when not with people) - Alone time (anxiety, depression)-Loss of social connections (death, divorce, moving job or home).

A few perspectives that help

Trust yourself- you're going through it for a reason.

It's hard to know when to stop. I mean, you're in this for the long haul, right? No matter how much you want to quit, there are always reasons not to. Maybe you don't have a new job lined up.

Maybe you think it's selfish of you to cut ties with your friends and family. But if that's the case, why do so many people feel like they need to stop?

People take on too much. In my days as a Primary School Teacher I've told myself I'm going to quit my job, but then I end up taking on more work because the work is more important than me.

This can build up into a snowball effect and before you know it your schedule is out of control and you're losing sleep. You don't have the right mindset.

One of the most common reasons people feel like they want to quit is because they're not happy with their work. But quitting doesn't fix that.

If you don't think you can be happy doing your job, then it doesn't make sense to keep doing it, but the solution isn't quitting your job; it's finding a new one.

Remember that everything in life is a test. It is meant to prepare us for who we really want to be

Tests are challenges we can overcome. They prepare us for the trials and triumphs that lie ahead in life. In school, at work, or in our businesses, we're always being tested. Something new always pushes us in a new way and we have a choice: to become a victim and complain or adapt and move past it.

You don't have to be scared of what might happen. As long as you're acting within reason and staying true to your values as an individual, it typically works out. The tests will help you build power in your life, develop character, and connect with others.

You're meant to go through things. If you didn’t, your success wouldn’t actually be meaningful

In the last few years, we have seen immense success stories come from start-ups that were just a year old. And even then, there are struggles that come with succeeding too fast such as not being able to manage your team, increasing costs and management of resources.

The same occurs in our personal lives as well. Whether things have been going well, life has it's way of suddenly throwing a curve ball at us we never saw coming.

Or if you're going through tough situation after situation questioning the hand you've been dealt in life.

Whichever end of the spectrum you're on understand that you are meant to go through things. If you didn’t, your success wouldn’t actually be meaningful.

This idea is based on the belief that unless you have gone through failure and come out the other side, what you are doing may not be worth much at all . While that may not always hold true, it's not the destination but the journey and process that is so rewarding.

Success is not always about being the biggest company or the best at what you do. It may be about having a real and valuable product that people need. Or it may be about getting your message across in a way that others can understand and are willing to work for.

It's also how far you've come and what you had to overcome to get there....Your scars, stories and lessons make it so damn valuable.

Success is not linear - it happens exponentially with a high degree of unpredictably

"It's not just the lucky few who can get ahead in life. Anyone can succeed if they put their mind to it. "

Haven't you heard a variation of that before but still question why some seem to have it easy. Mess up and mess up things just come their way.

If it only was that way for you.

You see, success is not linear, it happens exponentially with a high degree of unpredictability. The degree of success is proportional to how much effort and willpower you put into it.. And some luck as well.

What it means: No matter how many people tell you that your dreams are unrealistic, the only obstacle standing in your way is yourself.

If you don't believe that success is possible, then nothing will ever happen. If you doubt yourself and put in zero effort towards achieving them, then they will never happen. But if you put in the effort to make them happen, then you will succeed.

You need the courage to go all out and make the way, then it'll come!

Tips for Overcoming Loneliness

Get out in nature - spend sometime outside

Spending time outdoors is good for our health, but it also provides other benefits. It has been shown that spending time in nature can reduce stress, improve sleep quality, and even increase creativity.

One study found that taking a walk in the woods or by the beach for just 20 minutes most days of the week could be enough to help fight depression. and improve memory.

"The more time kids spend in nature, the more they tend to be engaged with the natural world and exhibit a greater sense of self-worth," said Dr. Sarika Gupta, a pediatrician at Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center, according to Healthline.

I know that for me personally if I happen to be feeling down about my day and or life, I will go outside and literally just enjoy the beauty of nature. In general, spending time in nature is shown to help with a person's mood.

Join a Support Group. Talk to people you can open up to and confide in

If you're feeling lonely or depressed, joining a support group could be the perfect way to meet new people and make some friends. You'll have the opportunity to open up about your thoughts and feelings with others who are experiencing similar things--and they may be able to relate in ways you never thought possible.

People may be around you but they won't always proactively listen or be able to fully understand what you're dealing with. These groups offer helpful perspectives right where you're at.

Seek help if you're experiencing any signs of depression

Depression can be caused by a variety of factors - from genetics to environmental triggers, to losing a loved one. The signs and symptoms of depression can range from seemingly minor (such as changes in sleep or appetite) to more severe (such as physical pain that doesn't get better). If you're experiencing any of the following signs, it's important to seek help

Just get to work - Begin tackling the hard things

Everyday, we are faced with the question of what we should do - whether it be work, errands, chores or anything. There are so many things that need to be done and it can seem overwhelming to just start on one project. I find that if I focus on one thing and just get started, then half the battle is already won and I've done something productive for my day.

Time is the most valuable asset and time is our most precious commodity. We should use it wisely and make sure that we're doing what's best for ourselves and those around us.

Conclusion

Despite a highly technologically connected world we live in, it's normal to feel isolated sometimes. Genuine connection may seem so elusive, however we need to step out of the way to find it. Different people may be useful in various seasons of our lives. But to get past any loneliness we must reach out, be honest about why we feel this way and take that next step.

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